So, I've been making do. In fact, I've been feeling downright Brawny™ with this purchase.
The paper towels did come in handy yesterday. I've pretty much been dining on local fare and thought a turkey and cheese sandwich, with a spot of mayo on one side and a dab of mustard on the other, sounded just the ticket. Spot on, and all that. After pulling the shrink wrap off the mustard jar (my apartment had been stocked with condiments and what not, except for the toilet paper), I gave the bottle a squeeze, and a few watery drops came out. Right, I forgot to shake it, so I did. I squeezed harder, and nothing else came out.
A little more pressure. Still nothing.
I squeezed just a wee little bit harder.
That's when I learned that mustard bottles here don't have screw tops; they have friction tops. If you squeeze hard enough, the lid will blow off. And mustard will cover everything, including my new shirt and shorts (not pictured). Yes, I think my shirt/shorts would be covered even if, as I suggested above, you were the one doing the squeezing.
I would have thrown my clothes into the washer/dryer immediately, but it (they?) had caught fire that morning so I thought this would be imprudent.
The mustard smell did help cover the rose smell, which I had sprayed liberally (I mean "socialistically") around my kitchen to cover the burning appliance smell.
Which begs the question: When exactly does a, um, "bachelor" do his laundry? When he has no more clean clothes. Bachelors, go ahead and say "duh". Hand washing, to thee I pledge.
Helpful travel hint: After wringing the water out of your clothes, lay them out flat on a towel. Next, roll the towel up. Finally, just stomp on it. This relieves frustration at the same time it dries the clothes out remarkably well. Try it sometime, if you need such relief.
Life is slower here -- at least if my toilet paper purchases are a barometer (and if barometers measured speed). Still, it might be helpful, at times, to apply less pressure.
To be continued.